Glimmer

(Written in 2015)

Today I celebrate 8 years of marriage with the man I love.  Over thirteen years ago we started dating.  There always felt like there was uncertainty in our relationship, prior to us getting engaged.  I never knew for sure that he really wanted to be with me.  There was one time we broke up, and I was devastated.  At this point I don’t even remember the details, but I remember a conversation we had after the break-up.  I don’t think Stefan even remembers it, but it was significant to me.  I don’t recall what we said, but I just felt like I saw the man he truly is, in the conversation.  I got a glimpse into the future, and saw what God could do with this man.  It seemed like I was the only one at the time, who believed in our relationship, and thought that we had a future together.  It’s taken me twelve years to get the courage to share it, even with Stefan.  This, is what I wrote.

Glimmer

All hope is lost,

All chances gone,

but I will wait for it…

it will come.

Paralyzed heart,

tear-soaked eyes,

I know it’s there,

why can’t I see it?

So I wait…

for it to come.

Choked by apathy,

drowned by disappointment,

I can’t take much more…

but it will come.

Then-

Despite the exhaustion in my soul,

I see it…

glimmer.

Invisible to all eyes but mine…

it has come.

Covered by a mask of control,

from behind hard lines it comes…

my glimmer.

I know it is not much,

but I will wait.

For from my glimmer

the sun will emerge,

and I will sit.

Eyes closed…

no more waiting,

because I know

my glimmer

has finally

come.